Near Death Experience

No need to be over dramatic. I was sick last week. Sicker than a dog actually. I have no recollection of being so sick for at least a decade or two. In fact, the last 3 years of practicing yoga on a daily basis kept me healthy as a bull. So what happened?

Last Friday was relentlessly hazy. I was in the TLV Farmers’ Market and by the end of the day had a slight sting at the top of my lungs. Nothing a glass of vodka couldn’t fix. The following day I passed out and couldn’t get out of bed for 3 more days. Hosting an alien predator in my system, I observed it growling through my system… yummy.

When the crash was finally gone, the toxin cleansing began. For two nights I couldn’t sleep, experiencing the most agonizing muscle cramps, and my nervous system was in hysterics. Ahh… sleepless nights drenched with terrorized howls and shivers, so romantic. Who knows what the neighbors thought was happening in my bedroom during that full moon!
 

As the sickness receded I realized that my mind is out of control. Voices that haven’t frequented me ever since the last time I was that sick (a decade or two ago!) reigned upon me like wild hawks! The most un-soothing fact became clear - all these voices were constantly responding to a variety of negative, aggressively intruding, suffering remarks, which I hear all day outside my window. You have no idea how these voices made me miss Canada. But all this missing was just wasted thought.

In the blue collar suburb where I live for the past 7 months, I see mostly painful faces of compromising simplicity. Many people are nice, but I see no evolution. And no one knows. Not even those who aren’t a part of this obnoxiously simple-minded lifestyle. I am the one who’s in a bubble. They are normal.

Can you for just one moment try to imagine a clean slate: a reality where the vast majority of people actually make an effort to not make others uncomfortable? Where people talk politely and give way to each other as a rule? When I lived in Canada, my dominant thought was – how sweet people can be – can you imagine how healthy that is? Now, go back to the suburban reality I described earlier and tell me what is normal.

Outside my window, I see parents dropping their kids off at kindergarten each day, content. The parents are about my age but they look a decade older. Is that the dream coming true, of building a home for the Chosen People in the Holy Land? Most people I see look like they operate by a destructive program no one ever questions. Good for them. Some things are better left un-questioned, eh?

We all live inside a bubble, no matter where we live. But once in a while it's recommended to measure what this bubble does to you and to your environment. Know what, in addition to all the religious holidays that thicken self-righteousness, why not start up a new holiday that questions the bubble? That says – we’re probably not all that right! Can we re-invent ourselves as a people? As individuals? As the whole of mankind?

Even if one can’t imagine a reality different than what he was brought up to believe is true, even if one can’t wish for anything better than what’s around him, for god’s sake please stop penetrating every green spot with your wool-gathering bullying! I know that life in North America is not all sweet and beautiful, but as long as people don’t act, sound and look like trolls, they pass in my book.

But then, then I realized what got me sick – it wasn’t the city or the country – it’s the fact that ever since I moved into this suburban town, there wasn’t even one new and exciting addition into my life! I’m mentally crumbling and it's emptying the guts out of my crying soul.

Starting next week, I’m joining meetup groups and looking into the local music scene. I’ll keep you updated. Besides, during those days of sickness I found myself missing some very few, very special people. So thank you from the bottom of my heart, you genius, beautiful, unique, sticky buds who became such good friends of mine throughout the years. It’s not easy to stay in touch when everyone’s so far away.

And you, dear readers, until the next time – keep it hanging the right way, eh?